December 31, 2009

Bye 2009

Okay where did 2009 go? The New Year will be here in less than five hours! Around the world in every language these three words are being expressed "Happy New Year!" Kisses and hugs are shared by lovers; friends and complete strangers. I never understood the kissing a stranger thing, oh well, while I personally do not greet the New Year with planned celebration, I would like to say thank you so much for following my blog and being a part of my memories of 2009.

There are so many brilliant people who blog (and I am not one of them, smile) who write stunning pieces of works. Since I have started this blog, I have become a fan of several websites.

I love the feedback and hopefully the next year will become more interactive Insha’Allah. I am still trying to incorporate videos into my postings. Okay, I can hear the voices…”It’s not that hard Nazeeha!” Well, we know what I will be working on for future posts Insha’Allah. If you remember from earlier posts, this gal is not tech savvy yet. What I lack in skill is made up by pure determination lol.

This last year has taken me on a whirlwind of emotions and challenges. To concentrate on my disappointments is to lessen the blessings I have received. I still make mistakes and will always ask forgiveness. Alhamdulillah seeing my value and not allowing anyone to belittle it has been a great lesson learned.

My journey as a Muslima continues daily. I don’t know it will bring but, Insha’Allah my faith will carry me through. And more than likely…I will write about it and share it with you!

P.S. 2009 you will be missed.

December 29, 2009

YouTube - Glory Be To Allah-Sheikh Ahmed Ali Part 1

YouTube - Glory Be To Allah-Sheikh Ahmed Ali Part 1

Posted using ShareThis

December 27, 2009

Three Weeks, One Day.

He could not have been more than 9 or 10 years old. I saw him once and his face still visits me unexpectedly. At first it appeared like so many pictures that have become a daily part of life in Gaza, until I looked closer. His outstretched arms were the only barrier between him, and the Israeli soldiers assault riffle.

His face masked in sheer terror…and his khaki trousers recently soiled from his own urine. As a mother, my natural instinct was to stand between him and protect him from this devil. But I was on the other side of the world.

My next instinct was also “natural.” I wanted to see that exact fear transferred to the face of the Israeli solider. Never will I understand such an attack. To inflict a sentence of death to thousands of innocent people is beyond comprehension. I know it occurs daily through out this world, and that does not make it easier to comprehend.

Today is the anniversary (strange word in this case) of the attack on the Gaza Strip. Activists from various parts of the world are joining in protest against the atrocities in Gaza.

In twenty two days over 1,400 lives were ended. Of that number 400 were children, and 100 women. I watched along with the rest of the world as the grainy films emerged. At times the audio would fail, but the story spoke in volume. Commotion as family and bystanders helped place the victims into ambulances. Later, they would become causalities.

The end of this massacre left behind broken families, hearts and homes. Alhamdulillah what remained and continues to exist today, is the humanity and hope of the Palestinian people. We in this world have not forgotten you, and I have not forgotten that little boy. May Allah (swt) bring freedom to Gaza Ameen!

December 22, 2009

Last Note from Nazeeha

As'salamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh…for right now I will be entering my last blog. Life is so unpredictable.

My mind is confused however; my heart and faith are secure. It’s funny that a computer has become my portal to the Ummah. In it I have discovered the best of people (Muslims and non-Believers).

For those who follow my words…thank you. I will certainly understand if you un-follow. Only Allah subhana wa ta’ala knows when, or if I will return to my virtual family.

In the mean time I will be searching for a new home. When things settle, I will try and go to the library and make use of their computer room. Before I start crying (even harder) I will only say,

I will miss the writing….
I will miss the amazing kindness of people…
I will miss Twitter and my beautiful Ummah; you made my days easier when life was not so kind. You were and are still my teachers, sisters and brothers.

Subhan Allah, please see the best in people and overlook the faults if possible. If I have said anything that was good…it was only from Allah subhana wa ta’ala. If I have caused any hurt… it was from me only and I ask for your forgiveness.
Insha Allah I will be back.

Last Note from Nazeeha
…love you all

December 21, 2009

Snowlflakes and Memories

The night felt like a soft whisper, the sky was a mixture of deep blues and watery gray. The only sound I heard was the faint crackle of tiny branches falling from the pine trees.

This was the first big snow of the season, and I was not going to miss it. I wrapped myself tightly inside my quilt and sat on my balcony.

Although the chair was freezing…I soon warmed up and silently watched nature’s winter performance. What is it that makes a snowy night so gloriously peaceful? Maybe it is the freshness of the air… or, the hush that falls over the city sounds.

The ground covered in a blanket of whiteness makes me think of new beginnings. I think the footsteps left behind on the untouched snow are like our path to Jannah.

We each walk our individual path. Though many footprints may be left along the way...there are none that will match exactly. It is our journey that is beautiful and individual…like the snowflakes that fall around me on a snowy night.

…Time to go inside.

December 16, 2009


When I was a young girl my mom would take me to the Doctor at least twice each year. Hand in hand we would walk into the office. Mom would go to the visitor’s desk and sign in…and I would happily enjoy the new roll of life savers purchased in the downstairs gift shop.

The reason for my visit was I had lost my voice. I know it makes it sound like my voice was dropped along the road, (smile) or, possibly misplaced. The Doctor assured my mom that I was perfectly healthy, and in a day or two I would once again be talking. I watched as my mothers expression changed from worry, to relief and her familiar smile.

There are still mornings I wake up and, (nothing) my voice without warning, has taken a personal holiday. Alhamdulillah I find this time blissful! Although the voice is needed during certain prayers Allah knows best. My intention I hope is still accepted even on the days, when my voice is still.

I am often complimented on the tone of my voice but, simply speaking to be heard, for me is pointless. It is not the amount of words you use to share your feelings, it’s simply the feelings.

They say, when one of our senses is taken away the other senses are heightened. I often indulge in the beauty of being still and quite. I cleanse my mind from sensory overload. Insha Allah I am left with placidity which allows me to be a better listener and observer.

There are so many positive voices and messages in this world that need to be heard. We hear them through written word, or the result of their good works that will live well beyond their mortality insha Allah. The voice when used to recite the Qur’an…transforms to a sound that words can’t give justice. I can think of no better use of speech, other then worshiping Allah (swt)

So while my mom was worrying about her little girl temporarily being speechless, who would have known, it would be one of the things I treasure most!

December 12, 2009

The Borders

Recently I unlocked my account on Twitter. My original reason was to block the posts of anyone who hated Islam. This paired with the request from porn sites asking to view their “pics”…like that would ever happen.

This started me thinking, I was putting up borders, based on a possibility of what might happen. Is this how prejudices start? With an idea planted inside our head, we react. Scenarios played out in my mind. I sometimes would search the screen waiting, for that one evil post insulting my faith!

I became a virtual border patrol in my own mind. Weeks and months passed off the calendar and Alhamdulillah, not one post was detected. I wasn’t keeping people away from my post on the contrary, I was missing out on meeting people who had varied opinion and were genuinely good natured.

So for now my borders to Twitterville remain open. Just like in the real world, we will not always get along with our neighbor. Instead of shunning those who have differences in culture and closing our minds to anyone whose thoughts reflect more different than ours, let’s rebuild. We may not be able to remove the borders on the map but, we can take down those that exist within our hearts and minds.

I have met some really cool people this week. Subhan Allah and it would have never happened if the borders remained closed. Hey…for the record the requests from porn sites, will forever be banned to a land far, far away. (Smile).

December 6, 2009

Soul Mate?

“You complete me” the line from the movie Jerry McGuire. These three words were able to elicit a collective sigh, and became a mantra for women. The reason being, she had found her soul mate.

The dictionary (true source of feelings and emotions) describes the soul mate as follows. “Somebody with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality and/or compatibility.”

If indeed, we are each given this one perfect person in life why is the divorce rate so high? That same person, who once had the ability to finish your sentences, now is accused of not letting you finish a complete thought on your own. What about the people who never marry, are they doomed to a life of being alone, never sharing the bliss of that perfect love?

Remember the days you could never imagine being separated from one another? While today you would chew off your own arm to be free from him/her.

As human beings we all yearn to feel beautifully connected to someone else. Physically and emotionally sure, we know what is pleasing to our eyes and for that matter, feeds our ego. I still wonder what a soul mate is, and do they really exist?

Alhamdulillah as Muslims we believe that our soul (Ruh) is given to us direct from Allah (Subhana Wa Ta’ala) while still in the womb. This being true, is it possible our soul is not searching for its mate within another person?

Our soul is seeking patiently the message of Islam. The glorious guidance found only within the Qur’an. The message comforts, gives life and sustains our soul from the moment Allah (swt) said “Be” until our final return to Him. It’s my opinion this, is the true mate for our soul. Insha Allah we can all stop searching outwardly, for what has been living inside each of us all along.

December 2, 2009

A Simple Question

Every day Twitter asks one simple question, what’s happening? Resulting in a response by millions of people from all over the world (I included). I remember when I first opened my account, I thought “Okay, now what?”

One self-explanatory question had me stumped! So I did the best thing…I deleted the account. I mean after all, who needs this kind of pressure? Weeks passed by, and I would still think about that question. So I sat down stared defiantly into the laptop screen and I did it! Not only did I open a Twitter account, I answered the question.

Feeling pleased with my tiny hurdle, I started observing what people would say. Some Tweets were inspiring, others quite comical and some were heart breaking. Remember Neda? The young Iranian woman killed while standing among the crowds of protesters and their opponents. The world was instantly a witness to her last seconds of life.

In an instant Twitter changed from a social network, to a link with humanity. People one by one changed their picture to various shades of green making a symbolic showing of support.

During Ramadan I would open my page and see tweet after tweet wishing “Ramadan Mubarak” and recently Eid al Adha (Festival of Sacrifice. For me what started out as a simple answer to a question has after 2,078 tweets later, become a part of my family.

Alhamdulillah, we never know how another Muslim will enter into our lives. Technology has been often accused for separating families. Families can communicate at the dinner table, several times a year during the holidays and even on Twitter!

November 22, 2009

Back To Normal

I can probably count on one hand, the number of times I am in a bad mood. So when a case of the crankies (my little term for feeling Arrrgh!) does strike, it leaves me mentally and physically exhausted.

There must have been five or six blogs that I have started and deleted recently. The process of transferring a thought from my brain, to the screen was the battle. Not for one moment do I think my blog is being waited to be read by the masses. “Twilight” or “New Moon” it is not.

While waiting for my disposition to return to its normal optimistic self, I passed some of the time reading and enjoying the writings other bloggers. Without naming the top five blogs that I follow the most…I will say what draws me in as a reader, is style of the writing. I can know instantly after the first few lines if I will be captivated.

Aside from reading the blogs, books etc, the best thing for me has been the Salat and reading the Quran. Despite my grouchy disposition, I still needed my ritual of being a Muslim. Allah (swt) has changed my heart to the perfect balance of fear and love. It is from this balance I slowly regained a sense that everything is going to be okay, insha Allah. Jazak Allah Khairun to my fabulous sisters, who are my continuous support.

November 17, 2009

You're Bringing All That?

The first thing we do at the airport is check our bags. Arrive at our destination, we unpack and relax. So why is letting go of our ‘emotional baggage’ so difficult?

Perhaps we had dreams to travel the world. Or, after reading the latest self-help book, we are determined to fix that broken relationship (again). It could even be a negative thought we implanted in our psyche years ago. Finally, do we still cling to the words from someone who is no longer even thinking about us? For that matter, they may not even be in our life today.

I found some old cards I had from what seems like a lifetime ago. Without strolling down memory lane and playing a game of “what if”…I tore them up and let them go. They were baggage and serve no value in my life today.

Looking at our past should never evoke fear or anxiety. Alhamdulillah it is gone. No amount of worrying will change the outcome of one’s past. Make a reservation for a trip. The destination is anywhere your mind desires. However, you can’t bring any emotional baggage with you.

Subhan Allah, we are given a new day each morning insha Allah. For those of us who are reverts…Allah (swt) forgave all our past mistakes and sins when we said the Shahada. Isn’t it time we do the same for our self? Tomorrow is Dhul-Hijjah may Allah (swt) accept all our fasting and prayers. Alhamdulillah, may the reading of Surah 22 Al Hajj be of benefit to us all, ameen.

November 14, 2009

ChristmasTime Is Here...

I just poured me a nice glass of orange juice (to tell you the truth, it is not a glass. It is an old preserve jar) I loved the tiny grapes and apples around the glass… so I made it my personal goblet of choice!

Okay, after that complete example of wasted information, (smile) here is my little observation today. Christmas is outside my window. Now as you may remember I usually sit near my window as I blog. The weather and the seasons are often a source of inspiration and overall contentment

Today I glanced out the window, let me backtrack a moment first. My windows are glazed on the lower half to allow the light to enter, yet keep privacy and the top half is clear. So today when I looked out there it was, Christmas.

You name the ornament and I am sure it was being displayed. This got me to thinking about my Christmases past. Alhamdulillah, I say past. As a former Catholic I had my fair share of animated reindeer and “Griswald’s” Christmas trees. Holiday music blaring while of course, watching “It’s a Wonderful Life”

But just as the movie was only an illusion, so were my feelings about Christmas. It was the loneliest of days for me. No amount of decorating or musical soundtracks could provide what was needed most in my heart. Faith, a connection to Allah (swt) is what I desperately wanted and was years away from reaching. Each day that I wake, my first thought is Bismillah and Alhamdulillah. This is a day that is not promised but is delivered as a Mercy by Allah (swt).

I still enjoy the smell of fresh pine trees, but without the reference to the holiday. Waking up and seeing the first snow of the year. Trees and lawns covered in soft flakes. My memories now of Christmas are a reminder that Allah (swt) was guiding me.

“Verily you O Muhammad (saaw) guide not whom you like, but Allah guides whom He wills. And He knows best those who are the guided.” Surah 28:56

November 11, 2009

A Day Filled with Raindrops, and Clouds

A day filled with raindrops and clouds. Hint of winter lingering in the air. Rainy days often lend themselves to reflection. Getting somewhat nostalgic over things missed, opportunities lost.

A day filled with raindrops and clouds. The soothing rhythm of the rain lulls me to sleep. Grateful to Allah (swt) when I wake refreshed, continuing where I left off with my day.

A day filled with raindrops and clouds. The perfect backdrop for getting lost in a book, that has been sitting untouched for too long. Freeing my thoughts into my blog or, creating that recipe I saw on Food Network...and sitting down to a lovely meal.

These are some of the things I during a day... filled with raindrops and clouds.

November 9, 2009


As’salamu Alaikum

Today was a delicious day! Not as a result of anything in particular, in fact my day was quite ordinary. I have finally arrived at that crossroad in my life. The point we all at some time or another will face.

Now for me, it brings a feeling of contentment. I am relaxed being inside my own skin. Liking me as Allah has intended, not needing to compare myself to anyone’s standards. Subhan Allah, my faith has become a foundation that will support the rest of my life’s decisions. My direction is clearly defined in the Qur’an.

I have lost “friends” over my firm beliefs. Alhamdulillah I have gained the opportunity for eternal life. Yes, sure to some (who are not Muslim, and maybe even some who are) not needing what is fashionable or popular in this life may appear extreme.
I will never be the “it” person. LOL, come to think of it…was I ever? And that brings me back to my delicious day. Crossroads are simply opportunities for a new direction. You may find yourself at a cross road now. Whenever it appears, stay true to yourself. The road may be a little less traveled but, the view along the way is splendid. Oh, and the people…nothing short of wonderful!

November 6, 2009


Recently I have started a quest to find my mosque. Why it has taken me so long, who can really say? Now in my mind, I have already attended and connected with my sisters. In reality, the search has been more disappointing to say the least.

Last week I spent most of the day searching online like an amateur detective for a mosque in my area. I had Map Quest and Google in overdrive. Then it happened. I located what I thought, would be my spiritual home insha Allah.

Sleep was virtually impossible last night; I was so excited to attend Jummah. Today I was up early had a great morning…then I was off. Arriving much earlier than needed, I took the time to prayer and reflect. Slowly, sisters started arriving giving their Salam’s (some barley audible) before wandering off to find a seat.

The experience was not what I had hoped but, today’s Jummah was about the Hereafter. And that is really what should be my focus, subhan Allah for reminders. Now, will I attend this mosque again in the future? It is possible, insha Allah. What I wanted from the experience I feel was accomplished. I made my Salat standing side by side with my sisters in Islam, and listened to the khutbah.

My quest remains to find “my” mosque. It is out there and insha Allah I will not become discouraged if the greetings are less than warm or friendly. My joy and happiness can not be removed. What was my lesson from today? We were all Muslimeen gathered in one location, serving Allah (swt)!

November 3, 2009


I have fallen in love. This is an all consuming love. It has taken control over every single action of my life.

The only jealousy I encounter is time…which living in this life can often distract my attention. Islam encompasses everything perfect. Usually when a person “falls in love” they tend to loose who they are as an individual.

We (me included) try so hard to make the other persons needs, our top priority. Why? Should love decrease us as a person? Maybe as women it is easy for us to nurture and comfort others. This can often allow us to overlook what should matter most. Our connection and worship to Allah and our self.

What ever your belief or spiritual path may be is fine. Never would I force my beliefs on anyone…but, if you ask me about Islam, I am overjoyed to discuss it.

Don’t get me wrong, I will always be a romantic and adore the feeling of a loving marital relationship. But, I know that I won’t loose Nazeeha again insha Allah (God willing). And for me that was my light bulb moment!

Placing Islam before any, and everyone is crucial for me. In fact it allows me more time to be a better sister and friend insha Allah. My mind is empty of negativity and my inner space is filling with goodness. I have been a firm believer of positive thinking. Smile, no I am not sitting in a candle lit circle dreaming of fairies. Sitting here at my little desk and watching the night sky makes me happy. My life is not perfect. However among the daily little difficulties are some fabulous gifts. Solitude to read and study, visiting with my old friends and making new ones along the way. I am in love with my religion…and it is the best relationship ever. Each day I try and be a little better than yesterday. It is not always easy but, I am trying.

October 29, 2009

American Woman?

As'salamu Alaikum

The song American Woman by Lenny Kravitz is booming in my mind as I blog. Have you ever had a talk or discussion and suddenly have it come to a screeching halt? The happy you have good brakes type of halt. Last night...I had made the comment that I would like to live on a Muslim compound (Waco, Jim Jones, Warren Jeffs) not even close to what I was referring.

Okay, probably community would have been the better word. I was also reminded that I am an American woman thus, hated by most of the world's population. My loyalties are to my religion first and always. Do I love my country? Absolutely. The reason I love it...this is where my memories exist, where my child was born and raised.

If you ask most people about their origin of birth, they will say they love "their" country subhana Allah. Not a listing of political issues. I was told by my sister in Islam..."U are not American" if I travel with her. That "Americans are HATED everywhere", and advised to put down my flag.

Traveling within this country and other countries, my experiences have all been positive! Alhamdulillah I have not met all the people of the world, or every American. So, I can't accept the statement all Americans are hated.

Maybe I am enveloped in a positive outlook regarding life. Yes, negativity and hatred will continue to have a platform for all who care to listen. Personally, I love seeing the glass 1/2 full... Oh and for the record, I would still love to live in a Muslim community in any wonderful place in this world insha Allah!

Muslima + American = Nazeeya (music fade out)

October 25, 2009

Steel Magnolias

As'salamu Alaikum

Magnolias...anyone south of the Mason Dixon line knows the delicate flower that I am speaking about. Or you simply may remember that hysterical movie with Julia Roberts, Dolly Parton, Sally Fields (well you get the point, smile) I am talking about strength.

The magnolia, while it looks very delicate is indeed quite strong. Which is how I view the Muslima. Individually we may appear fragile. But this is our modesty, in public we carry ourselves with a quite grace & elegance, not drawing attention to ourselves...or needing the approval of the dunya.

Subhan Allah when you gather several Muslimas together, you find our backgrounds and experience encompasses all genres. We are professionals; domestics; students; community leaders; wives and moms. Each sister needing and dependent upon the other for the unique gift only she maintains.

So you see, the beauty of our sisterhood is not based upon a degree or title. Instead it is our love of Islam and for one another that keeps us strong. This past week has been on of the most difficult and shocking of my life. I have felt like a magnolia in a storm...bending but Subhan Allah, only by the Mercy of Allah (swt) I did not succumb to the trials and whispers of Shaytan. Along with the endless hours talking with my dear sister (shukran & Jazak Allah ukhti)who shall remain nameless.

I am the only one in my family, who worships Allah (swt) alone. But, I am amongst billions who each day turn towards the direction of the Kaaba. The roots of our religion are firmly grounded. And our blossoms are the new Muslims each day that accept Islam as their religion.

I love my sisters, we may not always get along (smile)or even share the same beliefs. But then why should we? Islam does not mean an instant connection will be felt by all. However, at the end of the day it should allow for forgiveness. Each du'aa my sisters and brothers are mentioned, insha Allah. Tough or delicate my sisters we are flowers...we are "steel magnolias"

October 18, 2009

What Remains?

Bismillah, As'salamu Alaikum

Some days life is so astounding you just want to shout it from the rooftop! That feeling of unexplainable bliss. Then, there are the other times when it (life) hits you like an unexpected Arctic wind. The sting of changing relationships...people revolving like a door in and out of your daily existence sometime without rhyme or reason. Yes, and even the level of my own iman. My faith is not steady always..but it never is broken Subhan Allah.

If given the chance to alter the last few weeks, would I? Well (as I watch the cursor blinking)I would say no. I've come to a discover that I will be okay. Insha Allah. After the pain subsides and the dust settles, I will be okay.

As women let's face it, we can be a touch dramatic. And I hate to admit it but maybe I have been starring in my own one Muslima show, LOL. Seriously, at the end of each day when I do most of my know what remains?

My belief in Allah (swt). The travels, experiences (good & bad), and the blessings of this world will continue to increase me in my faith. Not sure what tomorrow will bring...but I do know what remains. Insha Allah.

October 16, 2009

Islamic Soup for The Soul

As'salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh

Bismillah, starting in you heart...your going to want to add 3 to 5 verses from your favorite Surah (whatever feeds your soul that moment) and simmer slowly, 15 minutes. Of course the longer it simmers...the better. Occasionally reflecting on each verse before adding more.

Next clean all negative thoughts from your mind(smiling I know, but we can do it.) and replace the thoughts with the remembrance of Allah (swt). Usually 33 Alhamdullillah, 33 Subhan Allah and 34 Allahu Akbar. Oh, then add la illaha illallah and let it sit in your heart as needed.

Lastly, make wudu and prepare your heart to receive it's nourishment. Insha Allah this recipe can be made ahead of time...even at the last minute and served. And the very best part, it never needs to be refrigerated. Your heart and deeds will always maintain it's freshness.

Serves one or, the entire Ummah!

Love my sisters fisubilillah


Happy Birthday, Happy Each Day.

As'salamu Alaikum

Today is my "birthday" and for the first time I really didn't connect with the concept. lol, I don't mean I experienced a lasp of memory...simply that it wasn't important.

For me it was a day of pure gratitude and humble reflections.

"The creation of each one of you is brought in the womb of his mother for forty days as a germ cell. Then for a similar period, he is an embryonic lump (hanging like a leech, known as `alaqah in Arabic). For another forty days, he is a mudghah (like a chewed-up substance: shape of a four-week-old embryo); then an angel is sent and he (the angel) blows in him the ruh (soul). After this, the angel is ordered to write down four words. He is told to write down the child's [future] livelihood, his life duration, and whether he is to be miserable or happy". (Al-Bukhari )

So there was no cake and balloons or loud announcements etc., in fact it came and went without a peep. And I as sit here...this was the best birthday ever! Insha Allah I am trying to be less hung up on material extravagance. Have to be truthful, I still enjoys some pretty things. However, in no way is it a requirement for my happiness. Nor, is it a reflection of how much I am loved.

The true gifts are always given and received from the heart! Happy Birthday kid.r

October 14, 2009

You Have Done All You Can

As'salamu Alaikum

It feels like a storm within my heart recently. When there is no control over the destination of it's winds or what will remain after it has ended. The sun is always behind the clouds. Faith never leaves us, it can withstand all things.
There was this line from a Christian song (and I only mention for it's relevance)which says, "What do you do, when you have done all that you can?... you just stand"

Tears have been the rain, and worries are my violent winds. Alhamdulillah no matter what "I" am feeling inside . Allah (swt) has already heard and answered my prayers. As I have mentioned before in past posts...I am living each moment and day as it comes.

I share with you my feelings. I assure you they will not always have clarity but, this is my point! Life changes without notice or warning, and my experiences are reflected and written as such.

During these past weeks my sisters and anonymous brothers have been making supplication for my husband's health. Subhan Allah he feels your support and so do I. We make du'aa for each of you to receive the barakah from Allah (swt) We will have to leave this world as we entered...alone and insha Allah surrounded by those who love us.

I have prayed, I always believe and hope in the Mercy of Allah (swt) and now I stand. See you on the other side of the storm insha Allah.

October 12, 2009

Discomfort, Not Pain

As'salamu Alaikum

It was only a matter of hours until my migraine would have complete control. A serious full-on attack of the senses, resulting in hours and sometimes days of nagging discomfort.

Whatever happened to mind over matter? Oh, and these "triggers" that are associated with headaches...please! Pretty soon just that act of waking up will bring on the pain.

I am just beginning to feel like myself. But even the light from this screen is a bit bright. Alhamdulillah it could be so much worse, so I really can't complain. I have come to realize that since accepting Islam, each part of my life is only for Allah (swt) including the discomfort.

True suffering and pain is what my sisters and brothers "live" with in Gaza, Darfur, Abu Ghraib, Nigeria etc. Subhan Allah I don't know what pain really means. Never forget our Ummah...wherever they may live.

October 8, 2009

Time and Reality

As'salamu Alaikum

I have several things on my mind...but for now, time is needed with my husband and our family.

More than minutes ticking away, it is the measurement of our lives. How we use it I suppose is within our control to a certain extent.

Alhamdulillah as a Muslimah I know that I will stand before Allah (SWT) and hear how I lived my life and the goodness that was provided by my hands insha Allah. May my scales (and all Muslimeen)be weighted with good deeds, Ameen.

In essence how was my "time" spent. Treasure each second of each hour. My thoughts right now are elsewhere...but the Ummah is forever in my du'aas. Insha Allah I will still blog...but they won't be as lengthy. Smile, maybe that is a good thing.

When I first started blogging, I said it was primarily to sort the thoughts within my head during daily living. The number of followers (though appreciated greatly) is not the encouragement needed to write. It is...and will remain a source of release and personal reflection. Anyone who follows, Alhamdulillah.

Solitude & reality...Notes from Nazeeya

October 5, 2009

Words, Jagged or Smooth?

With my tea sitting next to me waiting to cool and then eagerly consumed, I was thinking about voices. Actually, the "tone" of a voice and how it is perceived and often the affect on those who hear us.

Don't we all have people in our lives that we love, and I mean love to hear from? No matter what you are doing or how happily sit down and share together in the moments. Because their voice and spirit are an instant treat to the ear and perhaps a strength for our iman! Masha Allah, you can almost envision them smiling as they speak, and you always feel a little better after being around them. We should try insha Allah to be a voice and place of support and comfort to our dear family in Islam.

I am reminded of how the Prophet (PBUH) spoke with the most wonderful of speech and his tone of voice never harsh or raised...except in rare instances. I try, especially when I greet another Muslim to be joyful in my speech. Not being, I simply mean who deserves our very best if not our sisters and brothers?

Kind of makes me think of walking near a lake. You know when you find that perfect little rock and skip it across the water and watch the ripple effect? Well the same can be said about words, and how they affect an individuals spirit. Daily we we have opportunities to be hard and jagged like a rock in our words. Or, like a rock which has been smoothed by water and time.

Our daily remembering of Allah (SWT) over time will soften the jagged edges of our mind and heart. If we are kind and thoughtful to someone, who knows they may in turn...extend the kindness to others. For me, I ask Allah (SWT) to always make me mindful of my tone and speech. To save the best of words for my husband and family. I am grateful for the continued joy I receive whenever I speak with or communicate by any means with my sisters.

Okay time to get some work done. Oh my tea masha Allah was delicious!

a tiny little rock along with Notes from Nazeeha

October 2, 2009

Behind the Clouds

As'salamu Alaikum

Today would be best described as gray and cloudy. Some might even say dreary. For me days such as these are usually spent working on some project, that hasn't quite yet reached completion....and in some cases it never will, LOL.

I also view a day like today as some how, inviting. Offering me a rare moment to reflect and see how "I" am doing. Making a du'aa to Allah (SWT) for guidance in my daily walk. Asking that I never become careless in my submission to Him, just because I am a Muslim it is not a guarantee for goodness in this life or even a promise of Jannah in the here after. My strength as I call my iman will weaken if not fed a incessant maintenance from the Quran, lectures and books of knowledge!

Without any hesitation, I feel that our souls go through seasons and daily changes like the weather. Have you noticed how the body and mind react to a cold winter blast or, the healing rays of the spring sun?

As I mentioned earlier...most of the day was cloudy. I took a quick glance out of my window (taking a much needed break from the monitor, did I say much lol) and there it sat. This isolated opening in the clouds, from where this radiance of sunlight streamed through uninterrupted. As if clouds knew not to hinder the view. Subhan Allah it made me that opening in the clouds the sun was always there, I simply had to search. For me that was my path to Islam. I knew there was a "a perfect religion" I just had to keep searching and looking. Allah guides whom He wills. Each day I give thanks and insha Allah I will always be searching and striving to be better...and enjoying the weather!

Sunny Notes from Nazeeha

October 1, 2009

We Are More than One Month

As'salamu Alaikum and Peace to any who visit!


Think Pink sister's! October is here and the PSA's are running for National Breast Cancer Awareness month. Oh, I don't want to think about it! may be thinking to yourself. Hey, not my favorite chat talk either and why? Maybe it's because we lost our sister, mom, daughter or best friend to Breast Cancer. You could be a survivor who still can't look at or touch the scars from your own mastectomy.

Alhamdulillah, as women we pour out so much of our strength and time for any and everyone except ourself. Don't we deserve to feel better and keep healthy for ourselves? As my sisters I love you all for the sake of Allah (SWT). As women in general regardless of our beliefs and backgrounds Breast Cancer doesn't care who it captures. There are of course women who are more prone to Breast Cancer because of family genetics and history.

This is just a plea to ALL WOMEN, make the time, and make an appointment to get checked. The best that can happen is you find your are cancer free insha Allah...and, if you discover you have it, then get your support and strength from thoses who matter most to you. Make "your" own plan of action to fight and insha Allah survive. Let's take care of our bodies all through the year because, we are more than just one month. For all the medical providers, researchers, educators and Survivors fighting for a cure...YOU ROCK!

A billion pink hugs & notes from Nazeeha!

A Beautiful Quilt

As'salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh & Peace

I love that first crisp night in autumn when we scramble to find our favorite blanket that has been tucked away since last season. Now the condition of the blanket is not important in the least. I mean it can be tattered and faded from years of washing or even thread bare who really cares? For that moment when you first wrap yourself up inside, it becomes a much missed retreat. It's the comfort and familiarity that gives us warmth.

For me I think sisters in Islam are like a beautiful quilt...we each are a separate patch unique and beautiful in our colors and shape. Our thread is the love and belief in Islam which holds us tightly together. As sisters we are there for one another if only through a quick message, call to her cell or more importantly a needed prayer. As seasons come and go, so may our frequent connections with each other. Alhamdulillah, there will always be a link from one sister to the next. As Muslimahs, we never run out of room in our heart to include one more sister with plenty of space for more.

We may share an afternoon of "girl talk" and tea. Giving mabrook over hearing the joy of a addition to the family, or announcement of an engagement or marriage. And the time we are most share tears as we receive the news of our brother or sister being called to Allah (SWT). The point is we never forget the sister who is not there. Islam keeps the Ummah and sisterhood alive. Making sure to say "Give my salams to Umm so and so" tell her she is in my du'aa

I shared a nice talk with a dear sister of mine today, we did some "catching up" (smile) missed you sis! So when you snuggle up and get comfy with your favorite tea or coffee by your side, take a minute and contact with a sister who you have not heard from in some time. Insha Allah the warmth felt from laughter and talking about what's been going on since you last spoke. It is warmer than even your favorite blanket!

Sentimental Notes from Nazeeha

September 29, 2009

I Am Only a Traveler

As'salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh & Peace to all!

My spirit is in search of comfort. To know with certainty that I will see Al Jannah al Firdaus but, it is not within my power. I was raised to be responsible, thoughtful and successful. Where was my guidance and instruction for my faith?

If I hadn't mentioned it in my prior posts...I was told we were Catholic. I use the word "told" because it was not always obvious. Sure we would attend mass on Sunday but, that for me was where the faith started and ended.

As Muslims we are given the example of being a traveler in this life. Taking an occasional rest beneath a shade tree...before we continue on our journey. Thinking about death (especially my own) is not always an easy. However, ignoring it does not prevent us from returning to Allah (SWT).

This is the first post where I seem to be cautious with my words, maybe it is because this is such a personal subject. I know for certain that there is Paradise. Insha Allah my husband Mamoun, our wonderful children and those we love will be united forever. While I walk my path I will try and do as many good deeds as possible. Should we spend every moment preparing for death? I don't feel that is a healthy way to live. Instead living as if we are travelers appreciative for the goodness and blessings. Yet, never forgetting that this is not our (Muslims) destination. So I will never actually be comfortable in this life and that is good for me...insha Allah it keeps me guided on focused.

Serious Notes from Nazeeha

September 27, 2009

Where Is the "Customer"?

As'salamu Alaikum Muslimeen and Peace to visitors!

My voice is now rested. Alhamdulillah what does that have to do with blogging you ask? I talk out loud as I type. LOL not so loud that it sounds as if there is a major one-sided conversation happening...but, it's my way of editing.

Last week I must have spent half of the daylight hours dealing with various "Customer Service Representatives." While the remaining hours were curled up in a fetal position nursing the migraine resulting from the darlings of Customer Service. If you detect a tiny amount of sarcasm here...mission accomplished.

When did the idea occur that speaking to an automated voice response would soothe the jagged nerves of the customer? Now trust me, I have worked in Human Resources and dealt with almost every type of personality allowed to walk freely in public. While some I can almost assure you...should have remained home that particular day. Is it hard to have a pleasant voice and remain professional when dealing with the public? You Betcha! But come on, don't we deserve a human voice to hear our first question or complaint about the service we are not receiving?

The very things I love about technology, the instantaneous ability to communicate. To bypass unwanted information etc., is the same thing that is my sadness. Maybe the financial bottom line has, and always will be the winner. I miss hearing a pleasant voice...without having to punch in 100 options on my phone before hand, or play 20 questions with the voice system. Should it take almost 1 hour for a call that could be answered in 10 minutes?

Oh well, I guess I will just dial the number, place the phone on speaker and listen to the muzak! Bye Customer Service, you will be missed.

Heavy sighs and Notes from Nazeeha

September 25, 2009

As'salamu Alaikum

Sorry the past two days I have been trying to correct this blog format. That's life some days we need to focus on corrections and move forward. I keep this verse posted near my PC, today I noticed it and was grateful for the reminder.

"The example of a believer is that of a fresh green plant the leaves of which move in whatever direction the wind forces them to move and when the wind becomes still, it stands straight. Such is the similitude of the believer. He is disturbed by calamities (but is like the fresh plant he regains his normal state soon). And the example of a disbeliever is that of a pine tree (which remains) hard and straight till Allah cuts it down when He will." (Al Bukhari 9:93 # 588)

gentle reminder & Notes from Nazeeha

September 22, 2009


As'salamu Alaikum & Peace to any who visit!

According to the calendar the first day of Autumn will start, shortly before sunset today Insha Allah.  However, I think Summer is content to linger and heat up the days and nights.  There are numerous pleasures to living in an area with seasonal changes.  Watching the dance of nature as it transforms effortlessly into the next phase of life.   Subhan Allah...what a gift we receive each moment of the day from Allah (SWT).

The first time I experienced the sweet-scented fragrance of honeysuckle,  was growing up and playing in the warm (and often sweltering sun) with my friends.   "Momma West" was the name of this wonderful woman, whose home I would stay each summer.  She had this huge trellis of wild roses,  near the edge of her back yard.  LOL, not sure why the trellis was even needed...those roses had become a fixture of the backyard and our lives.

Now mind you,  as pretty as the roses was the sweet-scented honeysuckle bushes that filled the air.  Oh, my friends and I somehow made this terrific discovery.   If you gently pinch the end of the honeysuckle and remove the stem, you will get this single crystal clear drop of nectar.  Al7amdulillah,  it was like free candy!   Except you needed almost 100 of them to satisfy you.

The memory that I remember most is the perfume smell of the honeysuckle at night.  All most every neighbor had honeysuckle bushes in some spot of their yard,  so the air was always filled with the sweet but never clinging smell.  I didn't smell my honeysuckle this summer...but the memories are forever fragrant.

Summer Notes from Nazeeha


September 21, 2009

Over 12,025 Miles Away...

As'salamu Alaikum

I had a post already prepared in my mind.  But that's the splendid thing about life, if you keep your heart and mind open.   Alhamdulillah by the Mercy of Allah, life takes you and introduces you to new adventures and people!

Remember the movie with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan?   In case you haven't  noticed, I like movies.  The part when Meg is at her computer and she hears the little ding,  followed by the announcement "You've Got Mail".
That is sort of like me.  I still get a smile when I receive genuine mail.

Today there was an email saying...I had a reply to one of my posts.  It was from a  sister living in a small village in South Africa called Windhoek.   If you don't mind I want to share the reply from my new, and Insha Allah future longtime ukhtee Ingrid Hawa Saloom. Subhan Allah, this is why I wanted to blog...because how else would I ever meet such wonderful sister in Islam.   When used for the purpose of Allah (Subhana Wa Ta'ala) the internet and other technology can unite this Ummah.   So here is the reply from my sister...12,025 miles away.

As-salaam alaykum...dear sister in Islam. i am pleasently surprise and fill with complete understanding of your experience with the Hijab. I live in a country at the button tip of to South Africa, with a very small muslim population.......we are a country of 1.8 million with a s much as less as 100 native reverts to Islam and a 150 other f/nationalities mustly South African Muslims india, Pakistan and some Libaniese, more then half of the sisters don't waer Hijab........ hence the reaaction of people frowning on a hijab......worse nikaap. in the hole capital Windhoek we have 5 sister wearing nikaap and were they pass people move out of the way in fear. i have be wearing hijab for the passed 15 years and till as we speak people stop me on the street to ask about this strange outfit i inherited from the Arabs? or are you married to an Arab they ask. i wear it with pride since is my door opener to dawaah alhumdu lilah. keep it up and uphold the islamic idedity.
Gratitude and Notes from Nazeeha

September 20, 2009

21 Days to Change a Habit

As'salamu Alaikum

They say in the study of behavior modification, it takes "21 days" to effectively change a habit. Now if that is true, I guess it would depend on the determination of the person. Or would it?

I have been thinking and already longing for the return or Ramadan. May we all live to see next year, Ameen. Subhan Allah a month devoted completely to the submission and sacrifice of worldly desires. Now, even though as Muslims technically we do not fast a complete day. The simple concept of "fasting" or denying oneself of daily pleasure or instant gratification, can be a bit overwhelming.

We suddenly find that we start to define the number of remaining hours before Iftar. "Oh, sure I can come and visit ukhtee" all the time we think, 3hrs. 12 mins. before Iftar..if I leave now blah, blah blah. LOL the question is, are we changing?

Alhamdulillah I felt a small change in me, only after Ramadan had left. When the night before, I still set my alarm to wake me 2 hours before Fajr was scheduled to come in. Why? Because by the Mercy of Allah (Subhana Wa Ta'ala) my soul had become use to having the recitation in the early hours fill my ears. My body willing humbled in sujood, seeking the forgiveness and guidance of Allah (Subhana Wa Ta'ala). My need for nourishment, was replaced with the feeding of my heart. Change was taking place.

Insha Allah, these habits will be life long and continuous. You know sometimes a habit takes more than 21 days...maybe it takes an entire month of worship and sacrifice called Ramadan.

observing...Notes from Nazeeha

September 18, 2009

Have You Ever?

As'salamu Alaikum

Here's the thing, I have been having a very productive day Al7amdulillah.  Cleaned the house, have dinner all set for Iftar later tonight Insha Allah and even paid some bills.  Then I sat down and that was it, I felt suddenly exhausted. Not that "I'm a bit tired" feeling we all experience from time to time. I mean full on, "I can do no more, so don't ask me right now please." fatigue! LOL

Possibly it is a result of the end of Ramadan coming to and end.  Mentally and physically as Muslims we have pushed ourselves this past month in extra du'aas, extra acts of good deeds, preparing meals etc. Which for me at least has resulted in spiritual growth insha Allah...and the desire for a nice mental holiday. (smile)

For all of us, I hope and pray that we remember to take a few moments each day and replenish our mental and physical needs. Allah (Subhan Wa Ta'ala) has given our bodies rights over us...let us and treat our self as  well as we do our brothers and sisters.

Now that being said...I am going to take a tiny cat nap.  Fe Amaan Allah.

Weary notes from Nazeeha

September 16, 2009

Baby Blogging Steps

As'salamu Alaikum

Well,  let me start by saying Al7amdulillah for all matters...I am still learning my way around the web.  Now I guess I should clarify that statement, when it comes to "shopping on line" I am a true professional lol.  The areas that are still somewhat new is the world of "Bloggers."

What really makes a blog so interesting? For me it's that wow factor that I see when I view the page.
The personality of the person is there for all to view. For the short time in which you are reading their are in their little world,  so to speak. Also,  the people who follow you and invest their time along with you.  Sharing comments, support, disagreements etc.

My steps are still a bit hesitant as I continue on my venture of daily thoughts and or "notes."   Al7amdulilla,  last night was a complete hoot! I was reading a blog by this very good brother that I follow on Twitter.  So I am reading his posts...and even made a comment regarding the featured story.

So, I finish reading his page and refresh my tea.  Then before I leave his site I notice his followers and decide  oh, that's a good idea!  Because I hate to come across a page that I enjoy and forget to save it etc. Have you ever done that? do the whole history search thingy (yes, that is a word lol) only to never find the site again.

Well I click the follow me button...and poof! I am quickly connected to this other page asking me to create an account etc. Now, again I am making baby steps (smile) so after almost an hour later of trying to get out of this endless connection.  I decided I would just read his posts on Twitter...whew. Insha Allah I will get better so have a little patience with me while things get up and going. 

...Almost time for Maghreeb to come in (prayer in Islam) and will break my fast.  Hope I didn't ramble on too much.

it's just a note from Nazeeya

September 14, 2009

Breeze through your hair

Okay I know this is just the vanity of being a woman...but am I  was wondering to all my hijabi sisters.  Do you ever miss having a nice breeze blow through your hair?  Al7amdulillah I love my hijab and would never take it off. 

Smile...for now I will have to be content with the occasional wind that may blow under my hijab, offering relief and a reminder.  More important I know that my hair is not my, it is truly my hijab.

notes from Nazeeha

My first follower

As'salamu Alaikum

We all remember our "first"...first time we learned to ride a bike, prepare that perfect meal...give a speech etc.,  The reason why it is so memorable I think, is because of the effort we place in preparing.  Today I have my first follower for my blog!

But this person is more than a "follower". She is my sister in Islam, an inspiration and a complete whirlwind of energy and life! Al7amdulillah, Islam has given me more than I can ever explain...I now have a family in all the matters that are most important. Yes, geographically we may reside in various countries and cities however, our ties are from the heart and our foundation is Islam.  We will forever be connected as family and sisters and brothers in this life and insha Allah in Al Jannah al Firdous.

Al7amdulillah if I have 1 follower or 100...insha Allah I will always try to be positive and above all, be myself in my writing.

Just a quick note from Nazeeha

September 13, 2009


Okay, is the fact that I misspelled the word serenity as "serinity" haunting me!!!! Argh, it is the worst feeling.  I have tried to erase the word, physically push it off the monitor LOL. Hmmm...maybe no one noticed. They noticed Nazeeya, trust me they noticed.  If only the people who work at Blogger. Note to self--drink some decaffeinated tea.

I wonder if I deleted the post or maybe did a little cut and paste....okay just walking away from the keyboard.  Life's not perfect and obviously neither is my spelling.  Spell check why? whyyyyy!!!!

From my heart

As'salamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh and Peace to all.

Recently I read a post about being prepared for one's funeral and Janaza, (Islamic prayer before the burial) what struck me was the viewing of the Janaza kit itself.  There it was...a few pieces of snow white cloth, the shroud and a few other personal items required.

Sitting here viewing what one day, Al7amdulillah will be used for me.  Now before you think to yourself "How morbid is she?" As Muslims this is where our sacrifice and daily submission will lead us.  The time for which we will be returned to Allah (Subhana Wa Ta'ala) is only known by Him.  Each prayer we recite "...keep me steadfast when dying." Oh how beautiful and powerful are those words!  Because, even until the last second before we draw our last breath...Shaytan is whispering for us to doubt, fear and hopefully forsake our religion.  May we all be protected from the whispers, Ameen.

Shurkan (thank you) for my sisters in Islam who will prepare my body for my final rest.  Shukran, for treating my body with the respect and I try to maintain in life.  For those who will pray for me the Janaza prayer, Jazak Allah Khairam. and shukran for those who will lift me gently for my last symbolic walk on this earth...and then lay me on my side for my rest.

As you leave my graveside...your footsteps will be heard.  Subhan Allah may I be greeted with Salams from the angels and smell the gardens of Jannah al Firdous...may my grave be wide and filled with light and my good deeds. Ameen.

Shukran and Jazak Allah Khairam to my sisters who will take care of me on my last day.

From my heart....notes from Nazeeya


The hours right before Fajr are the most is an unexplainable feeling. No matter how tired I may feel when I wake up, Al7amdulillah after making wudu (preparing for prayer) my spirit is awake and ready for submission to Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala.

I am watching the sun slowly make it's appearance for the day. Do you ever take time and just sit? I mean without any distractions and wonder about all the beautiful and amazing creations in this world? Subhan Allah, I don't need to understand how the dawn sky can fade from the deepest midnight suddenly be filled with light. How the perfect sunset can give birth to colors that will never be duplicated again in the exact way.

Going to finish enjoying my remaining moments of calmness before the city fully wakes up. Take a moment and notice your day...more important enjoy it!

just some notes from Nazeeha

September 12, 2009

Why So Nervous?

Al7amdulillah you would think that I am writing the next Great American Novel...seriously I have left this screen and returned several times. "Get over myself", lol the chances of anyone other than myself reading this is minimal at best.

Going to fix a cup of tea. I think I feel a little confidence creeping in and I want to savor the moment! While my tea cools down and the smell of the lemon slices fill the air I will start with how I caught the blogging bug.

Remember that little show..."Sex in the city" well I was a semi regular fan. Exhale my ukhti's, (ukhti is Arabic for sister) note that I said "was" lol a fan. My favorite scenes were of Carrie sitting in front of her laptop typing away to meet her deadline.

Since accepting Islam many things have changed in my heart, mind and way of living. Al7amdulillah all of which has been for the better, insha Allah. You know the saying..."when it's right, you will know it?" Okay, for me Islam is right and perfect.

Often I think people make Islam to be this secretive, mysterious and often times misunderstood creation. I will readily admit I use to listen to the media's spin on "ISLAM" (cue mysterious music now) But, as with anything in life all aspects must be viewed and communicated fairly. So if you have never actually met a real life, breathing Muslim (smile) don't judge based on fears...I can assure you if approached with respect, you will find that we (I) are more than happy to share a dialogue.

My tea is the perfect temperature now. So this was my first blog and insha Allah it was not to scattered.

Just a few notes from Nazeeha :- )